Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Its a guy thing

I get this fact n myth about man from my sister, Ida...just want to share it with my guy friends dengan soalan "ye ke macam ni? ....

  • If you don't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
  • If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us anymore -- we refuse to answer.
  • Sometimes we're not thinking about you. Live with it. And don't ask us what we are thinking about unless you're prepared to discuss such subjects as belly button lint or monster trucks.
  • Sunday equals sports. It's like the full moon or the tides: there's nothing you can do about it. And shopping isn't a sport, never was a sport and never will be a sport.
  • When we're going out, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. Just fine. The first thing you put on. Truly. Now let's get going already!
  • You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes. Most guys own just 3 pairs of shoes. Why do you think we'd be any good at choosing which of your 30 pairs goes well with that dress?
  • Crying is blackmail. Blackmail is cheating. Men don't like people who cheat. See "Sports".
  • Just come out and ask for what you want. Let's be absolutely clear on this point: Subtle hints don't work, strong hints don't work, really obvious hints don't work. If you're really serious about it, just come right out and ask us. And by the way, the answer is probably "no".
  • We don't know what day it is, and never will. Write all birthdays, anniversaries and other special occasions in bright red on the calendar, and make sure we see it.
  • Trust me on this, standing up while peeing makes it much harder to aim. We're bound to miss sometimes. It's not the end of the world.
  • "Yes" and "no" are perfectly acceptable answers to almost any question.
  • Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
  • A headache that recurs every night is a problem. See a doctor.
  • Foreign films are best left to foreigners. Unless there's fighting in it.
  • Check your dang oil. And if your car makes a "funny noise", say something now -- don't wait until it gets worse. Remember: it always gets worse.
  • It is not in your best interest or ours to take that magazine quiz together. It doesn't matter which magazine or which quiz.
  • Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument and all comments become null and void after 7 days.
  • If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant it the other way. Really.
  • Ogling is genetic in males. It doesn't mean we love you less. As my old friend Rich used to say, "It doesn't matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home." Just be glad we have an appetite, OK?
  • You can either tell us to do something or tell us how to do something, but not both.
  • Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
  • All men see in about 16 colors. Peach is a fruit, not a color. And life is easier if you bunch all those "eggshell" colors into "pretty much white."
  • When it itches, it will be scratched. Live with it.
  • Know how you feel about handbags? That's how we feel about beer.
  • If we ask what's wrong, and you say "nothing", we'll act like nothing's wrong. We know you're lying -- it's just not worth the hassle to dig it out of you. So if you have something to say, just say it!
  • Finally, if we've settled an argument, it's settled, OK? Don't start it all over again later. If it's not settled in your mind, don't agree to the settlement the first time.


shazali said...

Puan Mary....huhuhuhu....

welcome to the world of bloggers!

I feel so enthisiastic while seeing you keep pushing yourself to write least, something precious about our local food! How about the chickeh "frame" (rangka ayam)?:)

keep in touch!

marie said...

chicken frame tu nak tunggu shah turun ke sini lah..asyik di awangan aje ..

baju raya kat bangi tu dah ambik ke belum?

shazali said...

e-Bu Mary,

Baju blom amik kat kedai tu.

Kalo baju tu slek jugak, heh...ade rase plan nk bakar kedai tu jugak! hiks..

Ishan_Qureshi said...

Salam Ibu,

Wah menariknya entry ni! Tapi adakah ianya fakta atau auta? Kenapa lelaki selalu dipersalahkan di atas kesalahan yang tidak dilakukannya sebaliknya kesalahan itu dilakukan oleh wanita? Jawab..jawab..jgn tak jawab!!! Muaahhh:-)

marie said...

irshan...pada akak lah tu semua auta tu..sebab pompuan pun pening jugak layan lelaki yg straight forward aje ni...banyak jugak makan hati oooo..

marie said...

shah...jangan kau bakar kedai tu shah, akak tak nak nanti akak kena bawak ketupat rendang semua ke balai pulak..

Ishan_Qureshi said...

SHAH & KAK MARY a.k.a IBU...

Uish Shah oi..apa kecoh2 ni..?! Relax aar! Kalau baju tu tak siap pun, boleh raya gak pe..! Ko boleh mintak Kak Mary beli kan t-shirt & jeans untuk berhari raya nanti..sekarang ni kan tengah sale..lagipun Kak Mary tak belanjakan lagi bonus dia tu. So Kak Mary, drpd akak pi hantaq lemang n rendang utk Shah kat mana2 balai polis, lebih baik akak belikan t-shirt & jeans utk Shah supaya Shah juga dapat merasai kegembiraan di hari raya nanti:-)

marie said...

baju bundle nak shah..baju bundle ni banyak yg branded tau..

husni, duit bonus tu belanja sebab ada nak pakai utk benda lain..lainlah mcm hang tu, habis duit bonus belanja utk belanja utk si dia

Ishan_Qureshi said...

Salam Kak Mary a.k.a IBU,

Pssttt...saya belum sentuh lagi duit bonus tu, akak!!! Buat apa nak guna duit bonus tu utk berbelanja sana-sini...kan Pak Lah dah bagi duit raya kat kita sorang sekupang (sepuluh sen). Tak caye ke? Kalau tak caye, cuba akak baca entry terbaru saya tu. Hehehe!!!

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